Finding His Voice: Communicating With My Autistic Son

As a mom, I’ve learned that love often means letting go of what I think should be and embracing what is. If there’s one area of my life that’s taught me this repeatedly, it’s caring for my autistic son. In that sense, I often say I choose my battles.

One battle I fought hard was over pictograms—or rather, their non-use. I didn’t understand why he needed them. He was verbal, though with some speech delays, so why add pictures? It felt like admitting defeat, a step down. And, if I’m honest, it reminded me too much of his older cousin, who is non-verbal and communicates only through pictograms. The idea of my son following that path broke my heart—it crystallized his differences in a way I wasn’t ready to face. But God had a different plan, and His gentle nudge led me to a breakthrough I’ll never forget.

When his therapists suggested pictograms, I bristled. I wanted his words to carry us, not drawings on a board. Pride and fear whispered, “What if this means he’ll stop talking?” Yet, his meltdowns grew, and his frustration mounted—communication was breaking down. Then, in January 2023, we had a meeting at his school to revise his intervention plan. His kindergarten teacher seized the moment to show my husband and me the pictograms she’d implemented in class, helping him visualize his daily routine. She explained how much he thrived with them, and I saw the joy in his eyes as she pointed them out.

That was the sign I needed, and I have no doubt it was the Lord speaking to me in that faithful moment. He was showing me how to reach my son differently. The next day, I logged into Canva and created my first pictogram: a “don’t touch” sign for the oven door. That evening, he pointed at it and said, “Don’t touch.” My heart leapt.

Accepting pictograms wasn’t easy—it felt like surrendering my vision. But as I trusted God’s guidance, I saw His wisdom. Those images became a bridge between us. I realized they didn’t hinder his speech but served as a reassuring anchor in a world not designed for him. Psalm 32:8 came alive: “I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go.” God was teaching me to listen differently.

Now, I cherish those pictograms. They’ve unlocked conversations—about his needs, wants, and feelings. It’s not about losing his voice but amplifying it in a way that works for him. For other moms navigating special needs, I share this: trust the process, even when it challenges you. God equips us with unexpected tools, like a simple picture, to carry us through.

What unexpected tool has God used in your parenting? Share below and let’s walk this path together, finding His voice in every step.

“Heavenly Father, thank You for guiding me to new ways to connect with my son. Give me the strength to trust Your tools, even when they challenge my plans. Bless every mom seeking Your wisdom in parenting. Amen.”